Sober Definition: Are You Really Sober From Alcohol & Drugs?

And so, I think that it would be just basically blowing up my life to go back to that. And then the 3rd thing is, just a story that I had. I want to meet all these cool people. Worst case scenario, I’ll get a year of like great personal development. And I was scared to ask him and he was like, Yeah, do it.

You are alive and you get to experience the  wholeness of human life. You are meant to feel both joy and pain. There is no change without loss. Let yourself grieve over and over again.

years sober + 5 tips for long-term sobriety

The second – and game-changing- lesson was that you cannot break a habit using will-power alone. If you rely solely on will-power, you will inevitably get caught out when you are feeling weak, or a particularly compelling trigger comes your way. One way I reduced the burden on will power was by finding a replacement for whatever need the alcohol was fulfilling.

• But the trend of people taking longer breaks off booze is rising.
• Usually, people use this definition in the context of addiction and recovery.
• Year 2 for you was like, feeling it all.
• Whether we like it or not, relationships are transactional, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with expecting that the people we spend our time with will see our moments of joy and growth.

Like, at what point in your life do you get to do something just because you’re interested in it? And I was just like, Oh, I have permission to do that. And trust that as you take care of yourself, you will have more space in your life and be happier and be less overwhelmed. I mean, and, and the way we evolve is different. Year 2 for you was like, feeling it all.

what I learned in 5 years of sobriety

So, it’s just, there’s an image that I’ve posted before but it’s an image of like a woman reaching her hand down and pulling up the next woman. And then, that same woman is pushing the woman above her up above. And it’s so beautiful to me because you know, those people are helping me, too.

It never, not once, changed a single thing. Worry gets in the way of happiness, and letting go of excessive worrying has allowed me to lead a much happier life. I used to spend an embarrassing amount of time worrying about the past, the future or the extra slice of pizza I ate for dinner. I was so miserable and so uncomfortable; I had to do something differently. The pain forced me to look around, evaluate what was going wrong in my life and change my situation.

Alcohol is only a mask you can wear to ignore what you know is true. Alcohol was never it and it never will be. You were giving it too much credit. You don’t want alcohol and all it’s consequences. Stop telling yourself that you do. You want to be safe and able to self soothe.

• I was too afraid to be doing what I was doing as me.
• I used to always have this meltdown the first few years I was sober because it was just too much.
• Like for instance, starting to work for you was something that just was a divine breadcrumb.
• Problems tend to be faced and dealt with, rather than temporarily washed away by seven pints of ale.
• After many years of alcohol-induced pain, drama and insanity (both for myself and for the people unfortunate enough to have a front row seat to the circus), I was finally ready to admit that I needed to quit.

When I successfully gave up alcohol, I felt I knew everything I needed to know. But one key lesson I’ve picked up is that there is always more to learn. I recently read Catherine Gray’s book, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober and it was a treasure trove of lessons. Not just the many resources she provides but also the wonderful telling of a story that was almost identical to mine. Experiencing her journey somehow validated my own and gave me renewed strength. But either way my sober house lesson to the wannabe teetotaler is not to waste time or emotion trying to convince people, and certainly not to take their counsel over your own.

• Cherish waking up with a clear head every morning.
• So, if wants to do something super fancy and would like me to Venmo them some money, I would be happy to because that’s amazing.
• Like, I would have to park the car, get the dip, get the kid, walk in, drop the thing off.
• That said, there is absolutely no reason to wait for the dream.
• It is all here for you on the other side of sobriety.

I often tell people, and I know I’ve said this to you, that like just not drinking is not the end goal. That’s not the reason you’re doing this. You stop drinking so that you can do all the other things in your life. With my life anymore and who I’ve become. There’s not https://www.inkl.com/news/sober-house-rules-a-comprehensive-overview anyone in my life that would be at this point like, Oh, yay.

Other Podcasts To Listen To About How To Stay Motivated in Long-Term Sobriety

Like, helping others and seeing people come back to life. And then there was another girl who basically I gave permission to do the same thing. And then I don’t know, we just sort of collected people like over time, it wasn’t all people I knew. It was like, Oh, you know, my husband works with this guy whose wife just went to rehab and she really would like to meet some people that don’t drink. Edge said Hekate, while not a pickup joint, is popular with first dates, as the lack of alcohol makes it easier for people to avoid bad decisions.

How To Find Your Purpose To Quit Drinking AND Stay Sober

I haven’t done that in a really long time. Actually, that kind of sound, I could do that. Like, this is actually something that’s pretty easy. And although I am supposed to raise like 50,000, but you’re like, this is what blows my mind about you. I mean, like, I like this socialization.

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And really, getting arrested and waking up next to someone who’s name you can’t remember is pretty degrading (that’s an understatement). Because the only way you’ll ever evolve from those feelings of anger, resentment, and bitterness is to actually feel them with every fiber in your body. Once you acknowledge and accept where you’re at in your journey, you can begin the healing process. I can tell you the one thing I enjoy most about sobriety is that I’ve learned how to slow down drastically. It’s natural to be scared shitless.

Learning to release the shame around drinking

And at points in my sobriety, I have become complacent. I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, that my life is significantly better when I do the work. When I stopped doing all of the things that got me into recovery, I (thankfully) didn’t drink. But I was definitely not happy, joyous and free.

And I was like, literally, I told you it is not happening. Like, she wanted to go and I was like, if your friends mom can take you, for sure, you can go, but like, I’m not going to take you. And I was like, there is literally nothing I can imagine enjoy less on a Friday night, that like taking you to this, but I’ll take you out to lunch and a pedicure on Saturday. And so, what we did then was, we said, we’ll come at Thanksgiving instead, because Thanksgiving doesn’t involve all that other stuff that I just said. Just involve physically getting ourselves there. And so, that worked for a long time, although now my parents live here.

It’s OK to be in floods of tears and moved deeply by something, even if some or lots of other people aren’t moved by the same thing. I also think it’s the experience of life, and getting older, that is making me more sensitive and in tune with what a fragile and brief and extraordinary thing being alive is. There are days that I wish that I was different, that I wish that things were easier, that I wish I had a “better” past or that I wasn’t an alcoholic. But no one ever said that recovery would be easy; they only said that it would be worth it. While my life isn’t always easy, it is beautiful.